AVERY INERVIEW #2
Interviewer: So today, unfortunately, and with great
regret on my part…we’re here with Avery Bartholomew Pendleton, the star of both
The Chupacabra and the recently
released sequel, Trail of the Chupacabra,
by Stephen Randel
Avery: It’s Sir Pendleton to you, little man.
Interviewer: Pardon me?
Avery: None taken.
Interviewer: What?
Avery: Exactly.
Interviewer: Okay, I’ve been told it would be like
this. Anyway, it’s been said you’re both
obnoxious and rude…
Avery: It’s a lie.
Interviewer: I agree.
Avery: You do?
Interviewer: Yes, after observing you for the last few
seconds, I can say you’re
the complete opposite of obnoxious and rude…you’re rude and obnoxious. Moving on, what’s the point of this new
story?
Avery: It’s about me, obviously. The book is centered on my daring adventures
and heroic deeds. Crazy Mexican drug
cartels and chupacabras aside…
Interviewer: Mr. Pendleton, please. There is no such thing as a chupacabra.
Avery: You should be very careful with absolute
statements. Global warming is driving
them north. It’s a fact...
Interviewer: Then why haven’t you found one? It’s been two books?
Avery: Bad luck.
Poor support. Those militia guys
really suck.
Interviewer: Militia guys?
Avery: Yes, the author refuses to hire ninjas and
relies on civilian militia instead. I think he’s just trying to save money. He’s an idiot. It kills the story.
Interviewer: What would ninjas do against the Mexican drug
cartels?
Avery: Sling throwing stars and stuff.
Interviewer: Throwing stars? You’re not making any sense.
Avery: Look…the book could possibly be about the
horrific struggles of the Mexican people with the violence in their
country. The unique part is it’s a
laugh-out-loud dark comedy full of eccentric characters as well.
Interviewer: Why didn’t you say so before? I’ve been told the Trail of the Chupacabra has so much more character development, so
much more history about the country, and,
of course, more of your insane letters.
Avery: Time’s
up. I want my money.
Interviewer: Money?
Avery: Remuneration for this interview. Paid in full, or I’ll kill the iguana.
Interviewer: What iguana?
Avery: Nancy.
Pay me, or I’ll off Nancy!
Interviewer: Nancy?
I don’t know who Nancy is.
Avery: Read the book, jackass. Hell, read the first one,
too. Then, if you figure it out, tell me
what you think the book means. I like a
good laugh…
Trail of the Chupacabra
By Stephen Randel
Publisher: Knuckleball Press
Publication Date: May 2nd,
2013
Genre: Humor/Dark Comedy/Thriller
Book Synopsis
Avery Bartholomew Pendleton is
back, and he’s just as crazy as ever. Avery is a paranoid loner obsessed with
global conspiracy theories who spends most of his time crafting absurd and
threatening letters to anyone who offends him. That means pretty much everyone.
Still convinced of the
existence of the mythical Mexican chupacabra*, Avery enlists the assistance of
the Southwest Texas Revolutionary Armed Confederate Border Operations Militia
(STRAC-BOM) and their manic leader, General X-Ray, to help him invade Mexico.
Accompanied by Ziggy, a burned-out hippy, and an uncommonly large iguana named
Nancy, the group follows the advice of a New Orleans voodoo priestess and heads
straight into the Mexican desert.
Unfortunately for the motley
gang of explorers, Mexico can be a dangerous place if you cross the wrong
people -- specifically, the Padre, a vicious drug cartel boss, and El Barquero,
a murderous gunrunner who has crossed Avery’s path before.
What unfolds is a
laugh-out-loud dark comedy of insane humor, unforgettable characters, and
chilling thrills.
*No chupacabras were injured
in the writing of this book.
Author Bio
Stephen Randel, CFA, was born
in Houston, Texas. He is a graduate of Texas Christian University. Steve now
lives in Minneapolis, Minnesota with his wife and their two rescue dogs.
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